Sunday, October 31, 2010


Your mission, if you choose to accept it:

Infiltrate the enemy.

Your human companion's mission: To laugh at your squirrel likeness for the duration of Halloween, only to be curtailed when she decides to put on your pirate costume instead.


Happy Halloween! :D

Friday, October 29, 2010

Make your community pit bull friendly!

For those of you living under a rock, I'm a "pit bull" owner (she's actually an American Staffordshire Terrier because pit bull isn't really a breed, but a description of traits). I'm also a member and supporter of Best Friends Animal Sanctuary in Kanab, Utah, a rescue group committed to achieving the goal of "No More Homeless Pets." They rescue all species of animal – even pigs and horses – and work to adopt them out to forever homes. If the animal can't be adopted (for health or other reasons), BFAS keeps them for the duration of their lives. This is the case with a handful of the Vicktory Dogs, and that's how I got into supporting their rescue work.

I get their email newsletter and I don't know why I read these harrowing (yet hopeful) stories before I even get out of bed, but I do. I suppose it motivates me in my goal to create a more fair world for my lil bully breed and other abused animals. I wanted to draw attention to an article about Pitbull Awareness Day (which I guess was last Saturday, but I've never been big on "awareness" initiatives, but that's a blog post for another day). It gives some really great information about pitbull stereotyping and how to end it. You can read that article here.

I know that people fear this breed for various reasons, but I know that Juno has assuaged those fears for many people. I think it's important to remember that not all dogs are created equal, as is the same with people. Some are raised to be aggressive but it's not due to their breed, it's due to their training. Yes, pit bulls do bite, but so do other breeds, while pit bulls bites are often mis- or over-reported; they also score highly in temperament testing.

Of course, there are going to be people who disagree with all of this, and that's fine. I just don't care to know you. So make sure you cross the street when you see me and my dog, because you have a better chance of getting hit by a car doing so than walking next to us and having my dog attack you. Keep your ignorance to yourself; I'm not interested in anyone spewing hate here. But, if you're interested in promoting fair dangerous dog legislation in your community (unlike the breed ban in Denver, one that specifically targets pits and not dangerous dogs in general), you can find info here.

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Stuck in my head: The Black Angels, "Young Men Dead"

Alright, advertising agency: you got me on this one.

So a few days ago I was just chillin', chillin', mindin' my business when a dreaded commercial came on during what was undoubtedly some mind-numbingly trashy television show. Before my nimble fingers could reach the remote to flip the script, I was captivated by what I heard.

It was an ad for a video game – Fable III – and the captivating song in question is "Young Men Dead" by The Black Angels. I immediately found it online and downloaded it (yes, I paid, because I'm a slave to the man, obviously). I've been listening to it non-stop on these past few rare rainy Colorado days and am hooked. It's psychedelic, moody and cinematic; it actually reminds me of Moby's version of Joy Division's "New Dawn Fades," but with a more interesting vocal sound. The lyrics are also pretty haunting, especially with today's conflicts abroad and the young men coming back home, some in a box and far too young.

I don't know about the rest of the band's catalog, but this song has piqued my interest enough to find out more. If there's more head-sticking fun to be had, rest assured it'll pop up here.

Here's the video game trailer so you can the effect of the snippet that hooked me. See where it takes you...

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

On those who cheat.

Some of you might have, at one point, sat at home crying over a significant other who cheated on you. You wonder how they could hurt you, betray you like that. How the HELL they could step out on you with someone else?? And, even worse, who in god's name is the horrific, tarty slut who made, no... FORCED (obviously)... your angel of a boyfriend cheat on you?

Well – that would be me.

Guys love to cheat on their girlfriends with me. It's happened several times. I'm not happy about it, nor am I proud. In fact, I'm pissed about it. Most of the time I had no idea the guy was dating someone else; once I did, I put a stop to the chicanery. Recently, a good friend decided to try to cheat with me and, honestly, I was shocked. I was also about to puke my face off from an over-indulgence of whiskey, and I can't imagine how I was attractive to anyone at all by that point. When I unhooked his face from mine, I reminded him of his girlfriend and that he would feel like shit in the morning for doing this. When I yanked his face off mine a second time (ugh), I told him that he was making me feel like shit. That I would wake up the next morning not only knowing that I hurt some other chick that I didn't even know, let alone have a vendetta against. And, on top of it, I would wake up just as alone as the night before. The moment, however passionate one thought it to be, would be (and was) entirely empty. And I was angry that I found myself in this bullshit position yet again.

Is it because I'm a hot-blooded sex vixen who dresses to kill and sleeps with anything that moves? Well, I do dress to kill (several credit card companies can vouch for that), but I'm not so sure about the rest. I love sports and am a bit of a tomboy (who wears high heels and tight jeans). But I've also been celibate for over a year (hi mom!) and have no intention of breaking that streak any time soon. I haven't been in a legit relationship since 2007 when I had my heart ripped out of my chest and stomped into a million shattered pieces. I'm not really looking for anything, serious or otherwise, either. Shit, I even only made out ONCE in the past year and it was because 1) it was my birthday and 2) my friend's last night in town, so it was more of a celebratory raping of his face. So what is it about me that screams "Pick HER!"? Is it because I'm the guy's gal, the "safe" bet, who won't go nuts and Google your chick, call her and tell her? Is it because I seem emotionally unattached to everything? Is it because you think that just because I can take a joke and all of your bullshit and still be your friend that I have no feelings? I'm fucking tough but no ice queen and hate feeling like I've been taken advantage of. And basically, that's what you're doing when you cheat with someone. You disregard not only your significant other's feelings, but those of the other person, to the guilt you place upon them and the hurt you assign to the one you supposedly "love." It's bullshit.

How do I know this? Because I've also cheated. Hey – I never claimed to be an angel, but I learn from my mistakes. I remember clearly the moment it happened... well, I was wasted, so not entirely clearly. Afterward, I cried my eyes out for hours. The transgression was merely a drunken kiss (in the middle of Red Square with snow falling softly... fuck, it was romantic for a Russia nerd!) but I was sick about it for weeks. I never told my boyfriend about it because it fundamentally changed the way I felt about our relationship; I knew that I loved him and only him and that I would never, EVER act that way again (and I didn't, so there). I also knew that if he stepped out on me, I would be absolutely devastated (tangentially, he might have just found out now, which is weird because wow, he reads my blog and, well, sorry, but he got the last laugh in our relationship and he knows what I mean by that, so don't feel too bad for him because karma worked things out). It was a moment of incredibly poor judgment (being drunk does not negate that fact), but I also learned something: I didn't want to be one of "those people" who cheated. Ever.

Somehow that feeling doesn't translate to some people. Some say it takes two to cheat, but it really only takes one insanely selfish person who brings another person into their crime. It's like making someone pick you up from the bank robbery without telling them they're driving the getaway car. Of course, everyone feels better if there's a third party to blame – then there's a torrid shrew who led the otherwise devoted man astray from monogamy (evil wench!). That's just not true. It takes one person to make the decision to break from monogamy, period. And I don't want to be a part of other people's bad decisions.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Coyotes and other things

Most nights I feel like I've had the life sucked out of me.

My feet hurt. I don't feel like writing. I don't feel like anything.

At night I can hear the coyotes. I can't tell how far away they are and I've never seen one. But I know they are there. The noise they make is nothing like I've ever heard. It's not the deep howling romanticized in Westerns but a pained yelping that sounds like harmonious torture. They're high-pitched and I can't help but think they all sound female. Tonight one of the horses in the field next door whinnied loudly. I've never heard them make noise before. Then I heard the coyotes in the distance. A frightening juxtaposition.

My feet hurt too much to get up and look.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Welcome to Doctober

Game one of the NLDS between my Phillies and the Reds popped off at CBP tonight. Thankfully, I had the day off and was able to watch Roy "Doc" Halladay kick off his first playoff run by pitching a no hitter. He walked one in the sixth but otherwise pitched an impeccable game (and had defensive support, especially from Carlos Ruiz on that final play).

My friend Nicole was lucky enough to attend tonight and send me this video of the last out and ensuing mayhem. It was a beautiful thing.

Good morning, beautiful: No seal? No problem.

Today's a big day for me... interview, first game of the NLDS (Go Phils, baby)... and no matter how much I want to sweat bullets (and probably will because I've been blessed with the gift of excessive perspiration), this video reminds me that all situations can be handled with grace and humor.

Thanks, Mr. President!

"All of you know who I am" (via Washington Post)

Friday, October 1, 2010

Awesome, awesome, awesome

I love Justin Timberlake, I'm psyched for The Social Network and the Roots might be one of the sickest bands of all time (Philly sons, holla!).

Thanks to Justin promoting his new movie, we got this gem of a rap medley from his appearance on Jimmy Fallon. It's already gone way viral but it's just too killer to not post here.

Timberlake & Fallon - "The History of Rap"