A few weeks ago, I had a conversation with a friend about another person with whom I was having issues. My friend arrived at the conclusion that this other person didn't have bad intentions, but was just being himself.
Well, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
When you get to a certain age, you know you're being an asshole. The excuse that one "didn't mean to be a jerk" or "didn't mean to hurt your feelings" no longer works. Not with me. Of course, there are the occasional off-color remarks, maybe a joke or two that doesn't sit well with another. But when a friend tells you "it bothers me when you say x" and you still say "x," you goddamn well know what you're doing. When you persist to act in a certain way that disregards the feelings of your so-called "friend," then your intentions don't matter. In fact, it's your *lack* of intention that matters.
You don't intend to change. You don't intend to care about my feelings. You don't intend to ever look outside of yourself as to the way you treat someone else.
In that case, I totally intend to tell you to "fuck off."